


The Strange Seawolf

by TheStrangeSeaWolf



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Bad Luck, Death, Grief/Mourning, Illnesses, Loss, Other, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:00:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26321551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheStrangeSeaWolf/pseuds/TheStrangeSeaWolf
Summary: A short piece to celebrate my first AO3 anniversary. Other than my usual pieces it's just not a happy or at least comforting read. It is about death, loss and grief, so you might want to avoid reading it if you don't feel okay.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 8





	The Strange Seawolf

**Author's Note:**

> A year ago, I came back from a trip to Scotland and started to write fanfics about Twelve and Clara. I had lost the ability to write completely in the aftermath of losing my husband, soulmate and very best friend a few months prior to that trip. I still can’t write anything that is non-fiction, which I did a lot when we were together. We worked in the same field, even in the same workplace, so, we always inspired each other. I think this ability has died with him.
> 
> Discovering the Twelfth Doctor and especially the relationship with his soulmate Clara (which I am able to see in both ways, either platonic or romantic, depending on my mood) helped me a lot to cope and so, writing about them brought me comfort. I started off with “[Hugging](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20647892)”, a story I had developed in my mind during my trip. As it was well received, I enhanced it to the whole “[Darkness and Light](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1489118)” series. Since then, I have written a lot of stories revolving around the Twelfth Doctor.
> 
> This past year has brought other horrible news, illnesses and death to many people who are or were close to me. I stopped talking about it because when I tell my story, it just reminds people of their own losses and traumas, leaving them more miserable than before, making me more miserable than before.
> 
> Writing is my escape. When I write, I don’t feel the pain. So, if I stop posting fics either my life has turned to the better or I have lost my ability to write fics, too. Always hope for the former.
> 
> Take care and here is a little fic to celebrate my first anniversary on AO3.

„What’s this creature?“

Clara asked, looking curious at the creature that paced along the long shore of “Blue Man’s Bay” on New Caledonia 2. Well, ‘paced’ was maybe the wrong word. Sometimes it walked, sometimes it outright galloped, sometimes it stood still, sometimes it dragged its feet as if it had a bad limp, sometimes it broke down, shivered and covered its head with its front paws, then it got up again and crawled forward as if its whole hip was paralyzed, just to shake its head and suddenly fall into an even trot again. 

“It’s a Seawolf, Clara.”

“But we have seen Seawolves before, Doctor. This one looks… somehow different. And it acts different. It doesn’t swim in the ocean and looks out for people to bring good luck to. Instead it… roams… along the shoreline, looking out to the sea.”

“Yes, that’s because it is as Strange Seawolf.”

“What’s that?”

“It’s a Seawolf who has lost its ability to bring good luck. If they experience too many traumas, this happens. Instead of good luck, they start bringing bad luck. And so, they leave the sea, making sure they don’t make more people unhappy.”

“It doesn’t look unhappy. Just… I don’t know. Strange.”

“That’s because it thinks of stories. As long as it develops stories in its head, it doesn’t have to think about all the terrible things that happened in its life. As long as it keeps walking and creating stories, it will survive. If it sits down to think about its fate, the sadness will catch it and it will become ill from all the pain. Usually, they just retreat in a cave and die, then. And this Seawolf knows that. That’s why you see that when it breaks down, it tries to get up again as soon as possible, even if its body is tired and tries to make it rest.”

Clara started to approach the creature. The Doctor held her back.

“Don’t. It brings bad luck”

“You never struck me as superstitious, Doctor.”

“It is not superstition if it is true, Clara.”

Clara didn’t believe a word he was saying but stayed at the Doctor’s side.

“Does it… will it be alright, Doctor? I mean… does it get better some day? Will it swim in the ocean again and bring good luck?”

“I don’t know, Clara Oswald, no one does.”

They both looked at the Seawolf who had now changed its direction, still pacing in the same aimless, meandering, strange way, staring out to the sea. Clara grabbed the Doctor’s hand and looked up at him.

“Can’t we do something, anything to help?”

“I… I don’t think so, Clara. I couldn’t bring Danny back and I can’t bring back whoever this Seawolf lost. It needs time to heal.”

“Will it?”

“What?”

“Heal?”

“I told you already, I don’t know, Clara. Sometimes I think you overestimate the abilities of this Time Lord.”

And with that, he let go of Clara’s hand, turned around and trudged towards his TARDIS, hunched, hanging his head. Right at this moment, they looked very much alike, the Doctor and the Seawolf. 

Clara, however, couldn’t bring herself to leave that way.

With a few steps she was at the Seawolf’s side. The Seawolf stopped and looked up, surprised.

Clara put her arms around its small neck and whispered in its furry ear:

“Keep walking, keep thinking about those stories, and I promise, everything will be alright.”

She didn’t know if it was true. But she _did_ know that sometimes, someone just saying that everything was going to be alright helped a lot.


End file.
